An Open Letter to My Brain

Dear Brain,

Thank you for being the one who can’t think or remember something important at the time but comes up with a movie script of ideas, thoughts and inventions when it’s time to work or sleep.

The one who allows me to write amazingly funny posts or stories on Facebook or in an email to a friend but won’t let me write when it’s time to “write”.  The one who can tell many stories out loud to people and make them laugh.  But if I need you for writing something specific you freeze up on me.

The one who remembers when I was a 5-year-old living in a small community of Central Florida and had me find my way back there (on a whim) at the age of 51, the first time I’d been there in 46 years, but can’t remember what I did this weekend (2 days ago).

The one who can’t focus if more than one person in the room is talking.  The one who can answer questions on Jeopardy and Cash Cab but shuts down if you are asked to do a Math problem.

The one who remembers everyone’s birthdays, all the lyrics to every song I know and has excellent face recognition abilities.  The same one who has me put the milk in the pantry and cereal in the fridge.  Remember when you had me put on 2 entirely different shoes (for a date with an Abercrombie & Fitch model) because to you they were both the same color.

The one who won’t let me think of a word so the person I’m having a conversation with has to help me find the most obvious word, ever.  The one who makes everyone think I’m a dumb blonde just because I accidentally put lip-liner on my eyes and maybe more than once, put the phone to my ear after I sent a text that says, “call me”.

Then after a lengthy conversation with me they say out loud to me, “Oh, you are intelligent.”

Thank you brain for making life so entertaining.


The Airhead


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