The truth matters but perception matters more.
Perception can change the definition of a truth for each individual.
Perception can change the meaning of adoption for a child. One child will believe he/she is special because their parents told them they picked them out of all the other children.
Another child can add up the realities that adoption isn’t like going up to a box of puppies and picking the cutest one of the litter. Therefore, the child who knows he/she wasn’t picked as the cutest of a litter realizes that someone had to leave them for another person to gain them. That child could perceive that they must have had something wrong for someone to give up a baby. If a mom who carried you around for 9 months could give you away as a tiny helpless baby what would stop these people(adoptive parents) from giving you away if they find out you are not as special as they hoped. What if you make mistakes or upset them, will they give you away as well? You might have an internal tape playing inside your mind that says “I better be an exceptionally good girl/boy and not upset anyone or they will give me away.”
Perception can change from person to person, child to child, etc. In divorce for example; the parents always make a point of saying, “it’s not your fault, I don’t want you to think it’s your fault.” One child may not have been thinking that it was their fault, they may have been thinking, “thank the Lord all the screaming will stop.” But now the seed has been planted in their little brains that it could be their fault or why else would the parents bring it up?
Another child might totally be under the impression that the world revolves around them, especially the world of their parents. They can’t comprehend their world falling apart right in front of them and they start to overthink the fact that the parents didn’t get divorced before they had me so it must be because of me.
Perception can make a man think someone is staring at him when in fact someone is looking through them in deep thought, not even realizing there is a person sitting there.
Perception happens to be our ideas, thoughts and rules of what we see or hear. Perception doesn’t necessarily equal truth but it matters more. We act or respond based on our perceptions. You could tell someone the “truth” all day long and if he perceives it in a different way, he will believe what he perceives over the truth.
Choices – Recently I’ve discovered I can change my perception if I want to. Instead of seeing every situation in a negative light, I’m turning to truth and if my perception doesn’t match up with common sense and I see a pattern in my perception always being opposite of the truth I change my “stinking thinking”. There is still so much to learn but I’m on my way.